Taking the Power Out: when you think what you have to say may be taken the wrong way
Have you ever tried to tell someone something that you knew they would be hurt by or take the wrong way? Of course you have, and so have I. Being misunderstood is a common pariah. We all hate it and yet we often can’t finish a sentence without the other person: falling apart, or jumping in, or getting defensive, or even running away. How do you get someone to actually hear what you have to say? In a previous article, “How to Say Anything to Anyone”, I disclosed the secret of showing concern for the person you are speaking to and had having compassion for them. This time I share authorship with my beautiful wife Carol who came up with “taking the power out” of what you are going to say so that the other person doesn’t get defensive but listens and actually hears what you intended them to hear –the way you meant it.Have you ever tried to tell someone something that you knew they would be hurt by or take the wrong way? Of course you have, and so have I. Being misunderstood is a common pariah. We all hate it and yet we often can’t finish a sentence without the other person: falling apart, or jumping in, or getting defensive, or even running away. How do you get someone to actually hear what you have to say? In a previous article, “How to Say Anything to Anyone”, I disclosed the secret of showing concern for the person you are speaking to and had having compassion for them. This time I share authorship with my beautiful wife Carol who came up with “taking the power out” of what you are going to say so that the other person doesn’t get defensive but listens and actually hears what you intended them to hear –the way you meant it.
Tags: communication, diffusing defensiveness, overcoming defensiveness, overcoming objectionsPosted in
